Favourite genre of music: J a p a n e s e|
Favourite style of art: A n i m e || R e a l i s m
Painfully ObviousIt was painfully obvious, wasn't it. A statement that rang too true through my mind as I was gathering my courage up; usually I was a coward and had someone else do it or write a note. No, I had to do this in person, I just had to. I guess I had to prove to myself that I could do it. I said to myself that today would be the day as the first few sun rays filtered in through the blinds of the bedroom window.Painfully Obvious by Squishy-Muffins
It was painfully obvious, in the way I greeted him and the way I talked to him. Yet I carried on as if it wasn't obvious. For weeks I gathered the courage and try as I might, the right moment never seemed to come. I decided maybe I shouldn't tell the boy with the glasses and curly hair. But if I didn't, I'd keep torturing myself with this bit of information. My heart yearned to be free of this pathetic secret as if it would burst if it's secret wasn't divulged.
Finally I could bear this suffering no more and
Dance with CowardiceI have thought about this for a while; for weeks my mind has pondered nothing else.Dance with Cowardice by Squishy-Muffins
I tried to say it numerous times but each time, my heart, my mouth, my courage, my words failed me. It was madness that something so simple could be so hard. All I had to do was to say to her that I didn't love her, that she deserved someone better than myself.
This insanity plagued me well into the night, into my restless dreams of her flawless face. Finally I could bear it no more, I decided the only way to tell her was the way of a coward. I am afraid of hurting her and so I dance with cowardice. Seems my only love is cowardice itself; I find myself fleeing away from love whenever I feel trapped.
Cowardice and my own shame led me to this, to write a note to her, explaining that I have been feeding her a lie; a delicious lie it was, I only wish I could believe it as well. But if I believed it, it wouldn't be a lie, would it?